My heart starts beating while I bounce the baby to keep him quiet and my brain is running a mile a minute to juggle the million questions in my head with not sounding incompetent. I’ve been nervous for days and the day is finally here. We’re at the pediatrician’s office.
Being a mom is hard. Making decisions all day about things like:
- how much to feed the baby?
- how often to feed him?
- what to feed him?
- how much to play with him?
- how much to let him be independent and play by himself?
- how often to make him nap?
- how should I get him to sleep?
- should I fight him to brush his teeth?
I could go on and on.
The self-doubting questions flood my head all day long. I feel like every other mom has got it down pat and I’m being judged based on all my decisions. I feel this even more so when we’re at the pediatrician’s office. The dreaded questions that they ask about how your baby is doing, what developments he’s made and how I’m dealing with them always make me so anxious. I know that I’m doing the best that I can. That’s all I can ask of myself, right?
It must be the lack of self-confidence, but for some reason I constantly put this pressure on myself to be the perfect mom. Whether it’s around the pediatrician, fellow mothers and even my own family, I feel judged that I’m not doing things right.
I’m not sure if this judgement is just in my head, comes from looks I get while at the grocery store or is from the questions I get from fellow moms, the pediatrician or family to seemingly check up on what I’m doing right/wrong.
I certainly know that I’ve judged other moms a time or two. It was never to their face, but the judgements are in my head. This is especially true when I see a mother dealing with children that are older than my Liam. Even before I had Liam, I was judging, thinking I could handle things better.
Now that I have a 9 month old, I know for a fact that there’s only so much you can do to soothe a crying baby while grocery shopping or assure an upset child when you’re changing their diaper. The same goes for if they see a bottle and don’t get it immediately, all hell breaks loose. Believe me, I’ve gotten a stare or two in Target and don’t even get me started on the stares I got in the plane.
As a fellow mom, I’ve taken the StrongMoms Empowerment Pledge to stop judging other moms. We need to create a positive environment where we can encourage and ask questions of one another. So, how about it? Will you take the StrongMoms Empowerment Pledge?
If you are a fellow blogger, be sure to grab a StrongMoms Empower Badge from their website and spread the word on twitter using the #StrongMomsEmpower hashtag.